Everyone's thinking about it. Where were you? What were you doing? Who were you with when you heard about the planes hitting the Twin Towers? I was in seminary, two days into my senior year. I was also 7 months pregnant with my first child. I had an 8:30 class, but I was late. If I had been a little bit later, I might have heard about the first crash before I came to class. But I didn't. I learned after class from a friend who had been at home. I crowded into the lounge with other staff and students b/c it was the only place with a TV, and we all watched.
There are things I remember. I remember crying. I remember asking my best friend what kind of world I was bringing this child into. I remember calling my husband to see what he knew where he worked. I remember that we had worship at 10am as we always do, but I don't remember much about that worship. Classes were canceled that afternoon, so I remember spending much of the afternoon watching my television at home, alone except for my swollen belly. We had tickets to see the US Women's Soccer team play that evening -- that was obviously canceled.
I don't remember when we resumed classes, but something tells me it was the next day. We had a few students with some connections to the tragedy, but I don't remember that it was very close for anyone.
I think what I felt was vulnerable. This vulnerability came from fear. If New York and DC and Pennsylvania can be hit, why not anywhere? Why not here? I tried to guess the number of stories in the tallest buildings downtown. Would they be good targets? Who or what would be next?
That fearful vulnerability didn't last long. The longer nothing else happened, the less likely it seemed that something would happen. And it didn't take long for things to return more or less to normal.
My daughter was born a little more than two months after the attacks of September 11th. Since her birth, and my son's, I've been learning about the vulnerability that comes from love. This vulnerability comes not only from concern for their well being but also from the hopes and the dreams that I have for them and the worry that some day they might reject me and -- oh -- is there really anything I can do about it? And then I think that God has been even more vulnerable with us, loving us while we were still sinners and risking our rejection. That is the kind of God we have.
2 comments:
I was at work when the first plane hit; my office is next door to a senior center, and we had just gotten settled in for the morning when one of the center staffers ran in to tell us that a plane had hit the Twin Towers -- that they'd turned on the television in the seniors' lounge area to get more information.
We came out and found a group of seniors watching the TV...this was right about the time that the confusion had subsided to the point where everyone realized that this was a deliberate act of destruction and not some terrible accident. One of the seniors said, "This is just like Pearl Harbor -- only now we're looking at it as it's happening." And then the second plane hit.
I thought:This is it. This is World War III.
we all felt vulnerable - even over here in Europe!
what I admire most though is how NYers got life back on track!
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